Dorothy’s 8 Most Ruthless Lines in ‘The Golden Girls’ — The Savage Queen of Sarcasm

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Nothing beats a comeback from Zbornak.

Dorothy Zbornak was The Golden Women’ whip-smart, one-liner queen. She was savage in her takedowns and ruthless in her comebacks. Whether or not insulting Rose’s intelligence or poking enjoyable at Blanche’s busy boudoir, Bea Arthur knew find out how to ship a zinger with a deadpan expression and easy comedic timing. She made us chuckle till we cried, and listed below are a few of her most memorable quips. 

“I higher not say something ‘til I’ve had my espresso…a slut and a moron. I’m sorry it have to be decaf.”

Dorothy awakes one morning in her standard temper — an ideal amalgamation of cynicism, impatience, and sarcasm — and enters the kitchen able to take her frustrations out on Rose and Blanche. She notes that her life could be totally different if she had the monetary means to dwell alone. However, as an alternative, she’s pressured to deal with two roommates who possess, effectively, robust personalities. 

She hesitates earlier than flinging a concise and biting insult to take a sip of her espresso and ponder her phrasing. In the end, she rakes them via the coals after a fleeting second of consideration. It’s typical Dorothy. No disgrace. No remorse. She says it like it’s. Although these two adjectives are harsh, the present is a testomony to their accuracy (not that we assist the slut-shaming). And the little “I’m sorry it have to be decaf” line — which she utters barely muted with an air of dismissal and nonchalance —  is the delicious icing on the cake, or ought to we are saying the graham cracker crust on the cheesecake?

“In what Blanche — canine years?”

When Blanche notes that she shall be happening a date with a person who is almost 5 years youthful, Dorothy asks this, for 5 years is a little bit of an understatement. There’s possible over a decade between Blanche and this week’s man of curiosity. 

Blanche has all the time lied about her age, but Dorothy doesn’t let her get away with such delusions. Blanche can delude herself, however Dorothy won’t permit this fellow Golden gal to suppose for a second that she believes such blatant cockamamy. 

“Not even when you have been hanging the other way up on a trapeze.”

When Blanche notes that she has been in comparison with Charlie’s Angels star Cheryl Ladd, she goes on to elucidate that, although they could bear a hanging resemblance, she has perkier bosoms. This zinger slips from Dorothy’s tongue with fervor, as she lingers on the p in trapeze to let it pop with depth. She delivers the road with a side-eye as she seems down at Blanche with a little bit of furrowed forehead.  

“Higher than anybody I do know.”

This can be certainly one of Dorothy’s most well-known responses in The Golden Women. Rose asks her if she will be able to ask a dumb query — a generally uttered rhetorical phrase earlier than asking one thing others might deem silly. But, fairly than dealing with it as rhetorical, Dorothy Zbornak (an English trainer lest you overlook) solutions the “can” side, noting that Rose certain can…and she or he’s fairly glorious at it. Dorothy pokes enjoyable at Rose’s intelligence all through The Golden Women, however this stays one of many funniest remarks for its sheer unpredictability, as we didn’t precisely count on Dorothy to chime in earlier than Rose started to ask her “dumb” query. 

“We’ve Maalox and Estrogen.”

After they’ve been robbed, Rose notes that the perps might have been in search of medication, to which Dorothy utters this fast reply. The one medication in the home are for hormone management and acid reflux disorder. Who robs 4 outdated ladies in search of medication? It’s such an idiotic assertion that solely a Dorothy quip may rebuke.

“Spare me the limitless inane particulars of how Heidi Flugen Doogle Gergen Plots efficiently matched a bull with a duck.”

When Rose begins to recount a St. Olaf story a few matchmaker, Dorothy cuts her off earlier than she travels down a neverending, winding narrative highway with little-to-no take-away worthy of advantage. 

Dorothy simply doesn’t have the persistence in the intervening time. Rose is commonly flinging round bizarre names and nonsense phrases with “ugen” and “ergen” in them, so this merely exhibits what number of tales Dorothy has listened to — she has endured so many ridiculous tales she will be able to fabricate her personal Rose-ified story. 

“No, Blanche, with a Venus Fly Entice.”

Blanche is all the time shocked when Dorothy has a date — as if she’s some type of monster with a hunchback incapable of touchdown a person for an evening out. Thus, when Dorothy says she has a date, and Blanche asks “With a person?,” she hurls this insult with viciousness. It’s a testomony to her festering aggravation with the sexless persona Blanche has assigned to her. And, her fast tongue has all the time been how she asserts her superiority. 

“And I’m the Pygmy Queen”

Rose comes storming into the room proclaiming “I’m the neatest lady in the entire world,” and Dorothy says this as a mix of shock and (dare we are saying) disgust crawl throughout her face. The sheer impossibility of Rose’s assertion can solely be met with an equally unattainable declaration, and Dorothy pulls this out from up her sleeve as if it’s been sitting there for seasons. 

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